TOMMUNIST: Cellino & Barnes billboards becoming passive aggressive
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TOMMUNIST: Sabres hire Nostalgia as new head coach
In a press conference yesterday afternoon, owner Terry Pegula along with General Manager Jason Botterill announced the new head coach of the Buffalo Sabres: Nostalgia. Member Berries… Pegula said: After…
TOMMUNIST: Kearns touts endorsement of Palpatine, Whiplash and Bannon’s liver
South Buffalo Assemblyman Michael “Mickey” “Democrat” Kearns added more support to his bid for Erie County Clerk this afternoon. After already gaining the support of the Conservative party last month…
TOMMUNIST: Trump to slash “Great” Lakes funding by 97 percent
The Trump administration will propose cutting funding to Great Lakes pollution cleanup by 97 percent, The Tommunist has learned. Lake Superior? More like “Lake Inferior”, am I right? Trump’s proposal…
TOMMUNIST: New Collins billboard appears in Hamburg
After Congressman and Trump apostle Chris Collins shred his physical body and became a being of pure capitalism (as detailed here), many in the Western New York area have wondered…
TOMMUNIST: Chris Collins sheds physical body, becomes being of pure capitalism
Congressman Chris Collins, who “represents” the NYS 27th District, has reportedly undergone a startling metamorphosis, changing from a physical organism of flesh and blood into a state of pure capitalism.…
TOMMUNIST: BINGOGATE: Trump Eliminates Bingo Inspectors Nationwide
President Donald J Trump signed an executive order yesterday immediately terminating all appointed “Bingo Inspectors” across the country. Said the orange water balloon: “When I said I was going to…
TOMMUNIST: Putin annexes Depew just before historic dissolution vote
On the eve of an historic vote in which citizens of Depew would decide whether to dissolve the Village, the point became moot as Russian Vladimir Putin ordered his military…
TOMMUNIST: BREAKING: Pegulas name Carl Paladino Bills head coach
BREAKING: Terry and Kim Pegula announce the hiring of local favorite Carl Paladino as the new head coach of the Buffalo Bills. We are scrambling for more info, but today…
TOMMUNIST: A Christmas Carl
As The Tommunist closes out the shitshow that was 2016, we look forward to our eighth year of “fake news”. We wish you the very best at this joyous holiday…